Want MORE Love and Intimacy? Be a Happy Valentine’s YOU!

DrBev, can committed relationships can benefit from Valentine’s Day, especially if the romance has faded?  My case is a good example, like many committed relationships—ours has diminished to such an extent that we  are just going through the formalities. But, we really love each other.

Yes, in those cases, Valentine’s Day can serve a different purpose, one of rekindling dying embers, reminding the longtime couple why they were drawn to each other in the first place.

Don’t delay BUY your gift today!  I have provided you with great Valentines Day Event gift ideas from Amazon.  If you’re looking for a gift for your Valentine, you’ve come to the right place. Amazon has gathered up all their top picks for Valentine’s Day 2013, from men and women’s watches and fragrances, to jewelry, chocolates, clothing and more. So whatever age you’re shopping for, we’ve got Valentine’s ideas you’ll love. Have a look around and find something special for your Valentine.  CLICK my Amazon link.  Check  my side-bar. Smile. Be Happy.

Additionally, DrBev has provided seven (7) tools, skills and emotional knowledge within this article to keep your relationship ON, HOT, AND POPPING!!!  Bonus for you a video,  little music from Al Green, an Oldie but Goldie, throw-back song to get your party started for you and yours.

More importantly, Long-Term Relationships for some could be two weeks, two years, or twenty-five years and any number days in between, remember it is all about YOU.  Whatever wherever you  fine yourself  in terms of commitment or relationships, keep reading.   If you have just began a dating someone new or in a it’s complicated, but new relationship continue  reading this is for you as well.  Emotions R Us, we truly all want Love and Intimacy in our lives.  We live for LOVE!!!

Research shows that couples in long-term relationships says that their is a serious reduction in the quantity and quality of their sex as the years progress.

We all know that feeling when you’re wrapped up in the heady euphoria of a new relationship, it’s hard to imagine the  reality of our daily life can ever put a wet blanket on our sexual desire, but, voila! Here you are,  a few years later, juggling children, a mortgage, a new career, and sex just may not be a priority. And the first step in rejuvenating a lackluster sex life is the awareness of this natural ebb and flow.

Providing there aren’t medical reasons for your dwindling sex life. there are some simple ideas you can incorporate into your life now that can help you and your partner resuscitate your sexual desire:

1. Prioritize sex.

Both partners need to make a commitment to nurture the physical aspect of the relationship. It’s a big step to acknowledge that you’ve been neglecting passion. But once you do, you can begin having the discussions that will get you thinking about sex and eventually bumping it up on your list of priorities. There is no shame in saying, “Hey, we got caught up in life and left something behind that we really miss. Let’s agree to openly and honestly work on this together.”

2. Plan for sex.

Once you’ve both agreed to make sex a priority, it’s time for some planning. You may be thinking: “Sex should be a spontaneous, natural experience. Planning for it will ruin the magic.” Not at all! Quite the contrary: many of the most enjoyable, rewarding things we experience in life are things we must plan for. And when couples put effort into creating the time and space they need for physical intimacy, they temporarily take themselves away from the stresses of their hectic lives. This planned-for time and space actually allows spontaneity to flourish.

3. Plan for romance.

A word for some of you men out there (you know who you are): Planning for sex doesn’t mean buying a new multivitamin and sprinting into the bedroom for a quickie. The type of sex that fosters a couple’s connection occurs within the context of a loving, intimate relationship. When you nurture romance and make your partner feel special, you set the stage for an evening of passion and great sex. Romance doesn’t have to be costly or time consuming (of course, it can if you want it to be). A sensual body massage with your partner’s favorite lotion can go a long way in setting just the right mood for passionate love making. Pay attention to romance first, and sex will follow.

4. Become playful and provocative.

Couples in long-term relationships need to revisit the art of flirtation. Flirting and teasing are great ways to fan the flames of desire. Have you ever noticed how people in a new relationship excel at teasing? Whether seducing each other at the supermarket or while sitting at a red light, new lovers discover ways to turn each other on in the most ordinary of circumstances. Unbeknownst to them, these couples are actively creating opportunities to flirt and entice each other. Are you ready to enter the game of flirting with your partner?

5. Nurture your sexual attitude.

The art and skill of flirting starts with a particular attitude. The most important part of this attitude involves giving yourself permission to be playful and provocative with your partner. Without permission, you will remain inhibited and lose the freedom necessary to have a fulfilling sex life. Learn to give yourself permission to have fun with your partner.

6. Talk about sex.

Your assumptions about what your partner enjoys sexually might be standing in the way of a great sex life. You’re both evolving–your partner’s tastes in music, food, and clothes have probably changed over the years, so why do you assume that his/her sexual desires are the same as when you first met? Ask your partner what turns him/her on today. Don’t assume you know (even if you believe you know your partner really well). Maybe there is something s/he would like you to try sexually that s/he would find exciting. Information about your partner’s sexual desires and fantasies can go a long way in creating an exciting sex life.

7. Become less predictable.

Some couples fall into a rut because their sexual routines have become too predictable. While familiarity is comforting and helps build trust, it can also become a little boring when it comes to sex. Uncertainty and novelty feed excitement and can give your sex life an electrical charge. Experiment together (there are many good books available to help couples work on improving their sex life) and create a shared sense of adventure in the bedroom (or the living room, or the study…)

REMEMBER:  “Emotions R Us !!!!”



DrBev is a National Certified Counselor, Licensed Mental Health Counselor, and a Certified Gestalt Psychotherapist, Seminar - WorkShop Facilitator, Radio Personality, Author and President and Educational Director of DrBev Mental Health Counseling.
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One Comment

  1. Adrienne
    Posted February 7, 2013 at 4:41 pm | Permalink

    Dr BEV is amazing.. I have talked to her on the phone quite a few times and she has lifted my spirits without even knowing it.. I just purchased her book… JUST SAY NO… for my kindle and I cannot WAIT to get home and read it!!! I LOVE HER…. any licensed health care provider should take her courses. I am not a health care provider, but she has nurtured me and taught me things as a layman that makes me want to BE a counselor.. she is FABULOUS..

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